We set off at 9:40 in the morning and returned around 9:00 in the evening. The cell phone ran out of battery and we were still fully charged, because it is a very refreshing day trip to the beach! The sound of the ocean waves washed away the distracting murmurs in my mind and the dense negative air (oxygen) ions along the seaside replaced the heavy things on my mind…

We drove and stopped freely along the way because we didn’t have a fixed schedule.

After seeing the roadside advertisement of “Five avocados for one dollar”, we agreed to stop and get some bargains before continuing on our way.

We stopped at the roadside vegetable stand which had ample parking space, walked to the stand to look for the five avocados for one dollar sign. We only saw green shiny avocados the size of mangoes for $1.99 each, then we each bought a few very fresh local sweet potatoes and tomatoes, just $0.99 a pound. Ann said she would steam the sweet potatoes, and I said I would make sweet potato porridge. I asked the cashier if she accepted credit cards, and she replied, “Credit cards will add a 79 cent handling fee, cash no fee.”

After getting the goods, I told the casher unwillingly: “I didn’t see five avocados for one dollar as saying on the roadside advertisement.” The casher lady pointed to the store upstairs behind her and said, “Inside, seven for one dollar.” I asked: “So cheap, is it good?” She raised her thumb and nodded. We walked up the stairs and entered the store, where we saw black bumpy avocados that were slightly bigger than eggs with a sign of: seven for one dollar, limited to 14. Since I was here to get a bargain, I happily bought 14 avocados for 2 dollars. As we paid in cash, I made a mental note always bring some cash when going out.

Today’s temperature and wind speed are very pleasant, perfect for a topdown convertible ride on CA Route One along the oceanside! We smelled the scent of canola flowers in the wind and saw a big field of yellow canola flowers. We could also smell the strong ocean salty air in the wind before we even reached the seaside.

We stopped at a viewing point which overlooked the coastline view and the mansions. The azure blue water was beautiful and the sea breeze was refreshing without any chill. Ann, a skillful photographer, captured many of my happy moments. Thank you, Ann!

It seemed like Point Lobos State Natural Reserve was having a big event today, as many cars were parked on the roadside. While driving past the long line of pretty parked cars, I constantly saw people walking towards the gate of the Reserve and I started to feel that many people are also not working on a workday.

The Bixby Bridge is a must-see for me. Today, the parking lot at the corner of the bridge was closed for construction. The parking spaces on the roadside were also full. Again, I felt that many other people are also not working today. From a distance on the roadside parking spot, I saw two young couples facing the Bixby Bridge and taking photos of themselves on the roadside close to the ocean, I felt sweet air floating nearby and quickly took photos to keep the memory.

Walking near the bridge, I remembered seeing a romantic newlywed couple leaving messages on their car window asking for a congratulatory drink through Venmo. I also remembered the time when I jumped up and down more excited than my son here. These are special spiritual tonics that come from revisiting a familiar place and I felt these tonics were silently nourishing my soul.

When I stood at Hurricane Point, which I am familiar with and like, I remembered the scene and mood when I saw a cage of strong little flowers here for the first time after my mother passed away in 2018… In my heart, I comforted my mother in heaven that everything is fine here!

Today’s strong wind that could blow people down was not cold at all, which was rare. I deeply enjoyed the layered and spectacular scenery between the blue sea and the sky: the curved coast, the surging white waves, the steep cliffs, the green grass, the undulating mountains, and Bixby Bridge. Thanks to Ann for suggesting we go out today.

On the way back, we stopped by a roadside that already held many parked cars. After getting out of the car, we followed the people walking along the narrow path among orychophragmus flowers, weeds, and shrubs towards the seaside. We soon went downhill and came to a narrow valley and saw many calla lilies blooming on both sides of a stream flowing down the hill. We had arrived at the Calla Lily Valley!

Personally, I think the calla lilly scene was too small to be worth a special trip, but it was a worthwhile surprise. When I was admiring the beauty of the Flower Valley with a middle-aged lady, I said: “This is my first time here. It’s beautiful.” She replied: “Is my first time too.” Before I could say a word, she smiled and said: “I’m from Colorado.” I didn’t say anything, because her first time was not at the same level as mine, and there was no comparison.

Then I was secretly happy: California is really a good place to live and travel! The ocean waves at the seaside in front of the Flower Valley hit the rocks hard and roared violently, I thought I felt the roughness of the wilderness.

Afterwards, we went to the beach with silver sand at Carmel by the Sea. While sitting on a big wooden trunk on the beach to rest, I thought the scenery of the seaside is really rich and diverse. The silver sand of the beach came with a calm wind and gentle waves which were full of relaxing people and happy dogs. It was a very peaceful scene. I couldn’t help but think of the sweet scene when my grandson Ben was still a single child and he came here to play. Ben is a big brother of a year and half old sister now. I wrote the names of Ben and his younger sister Sue on the silver sand of the beach using my barefoot slowly and joyfully, feeling the happiness of being a grandmother.

After leaving Carmel by the Sea, we stopped by Lover’s Point Park where the purple flowers had not yet bloomed. I was pleasantly surprised to see a beautiful picture of “pink clothes”: an old couple sat on chairs facing the sea, the lady wore a black wide-brimmed hat and a pink short-sleeved shirt and the man wore a white hat with silver hair and a blue short-sleeved shirt.

This sightseeing made me think that pink clothes are suitable for women of any age, because a little story of pink clothes had recently surfaced in my memory. In February, on a Saturday morning, after my daughter and I took my two grandchildren to play in Happy Hollow Park, I squatted and watched them playing in a miniature metal car. My daughter suddenly said that the pink sweater I was wearing was pretty. I was very happy to hear this and felt that this saying was familiar but couldn’t remember where I heard it before. After returning home, I checked my past messages and photos and found that my daughter bought me a very beautiful pink sweater cardigan for my 50th Christmas in 2015 and also wrote me a famous saying: “Women over fifty should always have at least one pink shirt in their wardrobe. It’s much cheaper than a facelift.” In the spring of 2016, I wore that pink sweater went to Golden Gate Park in San Francisco with my daughter: eating my favorite fried sweet potato at Stow Lakeside store, visiting the Japanese Tea Garden and climbed the hill behind the artificial waterfall by the Stow Lake. I also discovered that red quince flowers also come in white, pink, and light green variations! The memories evoked by the pink shirt made me realize that my daughter’s constant love and care for me. I am grateful!

After leaving Lover’s Point, we went to an Italian restaurant by the sea for dinner. Ann noticed that during the dinner service tonight, there were only waiters and no waitresses and that the other diners also did not look like locals. We ordered today’s seasonal meal: freshly caught fish (with vegetable and rice) and fresh scallops (with vegetable and pasta), and one fried squid appetizer. Oh, the free bread was very hard. Tonight’s rice had lots of butter, the pasta had a lot of olive oil, and the fried lemon in the fried squid was very unique. These were all
dishes that we usually did not make at home so we enjoyed them a lot.

We happily returned in the dark and cold with the convertible top up. While chatting about family matters and unforgettable events in the past and seeing the faster cars speeding by, I remembered my daughter had said to me, mocking me for driving slowly: “Mom, you should buy an ‘Asian woman driving’ sticker to put on your car.” Despite this, Ann encouraged me to drive slowly. She also ensured I was on the right path, as I tended to misread the GPS map . I sent Ann home, and she waved goodbye to me in the night. It was a warm and sweet scene, I felt grateful for having Ann as a long time good friend!

Tonight, we had dinner with E and D, a couple in their early 50s who have been in the United States for more than a decade. I had a great time listening to their different versions of love at first sight stories.

More than ten years ago, they fell in love at first sight in New Zealand and got married. Later, Mr. D found a job in the United States, and they immigrated here.

D likes to tell the story of the first time he met E in New Zealand: “My friend and I went to an indoor rock climbing club. As soon as we entered the climbing area, I saw E hanging high on the climbing wall and everyone below was looking up and chanting for her. E didn’t reach the top and almost fell into my arms. I fell in love with her at that moment.” D added: “Oh, my friend happened to know E.”

Watching a successful career gentleman vividly describing the details of love at first sight from more than ten years ago, in front of his loving wife, I felt like I were there watching E climb too, and happiness seemed spread instantly around us. I couldn’t help but clap my hands and asked E who was sitting next to D: “Do you remember those details?”

E smiled sweetly and said: ” I don’t remember it, this is his version.”

I told E sincerely: “From the way he described the scene of your first time meet, I can tell that he still loves you fondly.”

E quickly looked at D sitting next to her and said with the same sweet smile: “He didn’t mention how he was looked back then. He had long hair that went past his waist, a goatee under his chin, and big earrings.”

I immediately turned my head to look at D, who was still looking at E happily. I saw a typical Western male scholar, with silver-gray hair cut short, wearing a pair of black-rimmed glasses and a dark and light blue checkered shirt. The D in front of me has no trace of what E just described. Of course, I couldn’t get close enough to see his ear holes. I half-jokingly said to E: “Woo, You tamed him very successfully!”

My daughter who sat face to E said to me: “Mom, how can you say that?”

I quickly added: “You two are soulmates, destined to be together in life!”

E nodded and said: “Yes.”

E and D continued talking about their uniqueness. As E’s father is a very traditional Asian man, D had to cut his long hair, shave his beard, take off the earrings, and learn Asian etiquette before he went to meet his future father-in-law and asked for permission to marry his daughter. D happily demonstrated to us how to pass a teacup with one hand while being held by another hand, and I immediately noticed that D’s posture of teacup holding is different from the Chinese posture of using both hands to hold the teacup.

I curiously asked E whether she liked the United States or New Zealand. She said she liked the simple and natural New Zealand: “The birds in New Zealand are very simple, brown and yellow-brown, not as gorgeous and colorful as the birds in our neighboring Australia.” But she doesn’t feel that she belongs to New Zealand because there are very few Asians at that time; in this regard, she prefers Silicon Valley in the United States. She said that when she goes to a restaurant with her friends, she often feels like she was back in her motherland because of the food and the people sitting with her. She added with a smile: “When D eats with us, and he is usually the only white.”

Thanks to the diverse and inclusive culture of Silicon Valley, I experienced the exotic customs and practices with personal views at home.

Little Episodes

1. New Zealand’s birds are simple, brown and yellow-brown, not as colorful as their neighbor Australia’s birds.

2. Our dinner table, E and D have had a pet “Toto” for seven years. He is very well-behaved and comfortable around children, so both of our little ones love Toto very much.

December 21，at home

On the evening of December 21, 2023, my daughter invited Grace and Lou for dinner as they were going out for Christmas. I feel very happy to host the friends we made in Massachusetts at our home in California.

While I was cooking fish, shrimps, and rice noodles for dinner (Grace likes seafood, Lou likes rice noodles), I thought of the good times we spent together in Waltham, Massachusetts. During 2020 COVID pandemic period, while my daughter was studying in Germany, I was alone at Waltham. Grace and Lou often stopped by our home to bring their home-made delicious dishes: stir-fried lamb, braised beef, Shandong pancakes, and Saqima, etc. also to spend time to chat with me. We climbed the Blue Mountains in Massachusetts together in the fall in 2020. My daughter later told me: “After you guys climbed the Blue Mountain together, Grace messaged me: ‘Your mother is in good health as she had no trouble at all with climbing.’ I was so happy to hear this news!”

It seems that the last time I saw Grace was in the summer, not long after my granddaughter was born. When I saw Grace this time, I felt she is even more beautiful and fashionable. She always reminds me of a good friend I used to work with.

During dinner, we congratulated Grace on passing her Ph.D. comprehensive exams and Lou on switching his companies.

After dinner, I gave a box of wedding candies that I had just brought back from my son and daughter-in-law’s Flower Moon Celebration in Beijing. Graces took the box and praised its festive color and beautiful design, then opened the box and poured the wedding candies on the dining table. She pointed to the pretty wedding candies and said: “Oh, many of the candies are my favorites in the past.” She and Lou then each picked out their favorite candies to eat.

Seeing Grace happily talking and soaking the wedding candy inside her mouth, I asked her: “Do you think the Egyptian pyramids are really pre-historical?” My daughter immediately asked me: “Why are you asking this question?” I said: “Recently, I watched some short video blogs that were shared by friends who travel very often and I saw the videos showed evidence that the pyramids were built with cement and said they were built by later generations. I want to know whether this statement is reliable.” Grace said: “That statement is not reliable. I am sure that the Egyptian pyramids have a very long history!” Because Grace is a doctoral student who is currently working on her Ph.D. essay on the 3000 BC Akkadian at JHU (the abbreviation for Johns Hopkins University), I believed her words and said: “Thank you for the expert’s words!” She smiled and said again: “Aunt Jing, our JHU History Department has two professors who specialize in the history of ancient Egypt. If you have more questions, I can ask the professors to answer them for you.” I quickly said: “I have no questions, I just want to know that the Egyptian pyramids are worth a visit, because I want to see them. “Then, I turned around and told my daughter: “After I came back from Peru, you asked me where I want to go next year. Now I have the answer: I want to see the pyramids of Egypt next year.”

My trips in November to Peru to see Machu Picchu and in December to Beijing to attend my daughter-in-law and son’s Flower Moon Celebration enlightened tonight’s gathering and I felt that the joy of traveling was lingering in the air.

While traveling in Peru in my free time, I came up with a despondent desire to see the pyramids of Egypt. After looking through the photos I took in Peru, I realized that it was on November 21st, exactly a month ago. There is also a story about that day.

November 21st，in Peru

Today is the first day after our tour group visited Machu Picchu, one of the “New Seven Wonders”. The tour guide took us to a farmhouse in Pisaq to make and eat local, empanadas (Spanish pies). I still remember the lady boss of the farmhouse proudly introducing herself: “I am a descendant of the King who built Machu Picchu more than 400 years ago.”

Because this was a group activity with plenty of alone time, the tour guide suggested that we form a two-people team to make empanadas and take photos of each other. I teamed up with Vaida, an Indian girl who is a sophomore in Texas. While waiting for the empanadas dough, we chatted. I told her that my daughter had also traveled alone in a tour group when she was a college student at University College of London in London. She said she is the only child in her family, she will go back to see her parents in India before Christmas, and she loves traveling. I asked her: “Where is a place worth visiting in India?” She said: “Taj Mahal.” I was not familiar with the name, so I asked her curiously: “India has a long history of Buddhism. Is this a natural scenery or a historical building?” She was surprised to hear my question, she opened her phone and found the photos of Taj Mahal and showed them to me. As soon as I saw the photo, I said quickly: “Oh, I know this place! After Diana and Charles had marital problems, she went there to take the famous photo.” Vaida frowned and seemed deflated. It was obvious that she was not satisfied with my interpretation. I looked at the innocent expression on her face and laughed quietly. I guessed she might be thinking to herself: “How could Jean so keen on gossip?” She said that she had been there with her parents a few years ago, and it is also one of the “New Seven Wonders”.

We lost our two-people team concept once we gathered around a big table and started kneading the dough to make our own empanadas, and I made two empanadas with different fillings. Because the empanadas we make will be placed on a large baking pan and put into the fire stove.， we also used dough stick to shape the first letters of our names to patch on the empanadas for easy identification so we could eat our own empanadas. I felt my empanadas were so tasty, because I made them myself.

As tonight had no group dinner and I felt altitude sickness, I stayed in my room after checking into the hotel in Cuzco to learn about India’s Taj Mahal and related information online. The “New Seven Wonders” were introduced in 2007, including
1. Great Wall of China
2. Colosseum in Roma, Italy
3. Taj Mahal in Agra, India
4. Chichen Itza in Yucatan, Mexico
5. the ancient city of Petra in Jordan
6. Machu Picchu in Peru
7. Christ the Redeemer in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

It turns out that there is another “Seven Wonders of the Ancient World”: the Pyramid of Khufu in Egypt, the Hanging Gardens of Babylon, the Temple of Artemis, the Statue of Olympian Zeus, and The Mausoleum at Halicarnassus. Six of them have disappeared, and only the Pyramid of Khufu in Egypt remains.

I noticed that there are two wonders were built with legendaries of grand love: the first is the lost Hanging Gardens of Babylon, which was built between 604 BC and 562 BC by a King to please his beloved concubine and the second is Taj Mahal in India, which was build in 1648 in memory of a King’s beloved concubine. I guess the carrying force of this kind of legend held people’s desire for earth-shattering love. However, I have no interest in the Taj Mahal in India. I really want to see the Egyptian pyramids, a despondent desire, because I saw some videos saying that the pyramids are fake and were built by future generations with cement.

Little Episodes

1. 12-21-2023, Our dining ware, dishes, red wine, my son and daughter-in-law’s wedding candy box, wedding candy, and my granddaughter, being held by Lou, is about to be held by Grace.

2. 12-19-2023, On my first day back home from Beijing, Ben, my grandson, loved playing with his uncle and aunt’s wedding candy box, pouring out the shiny candies as toys and putting them back into the box.

3. 11-21-2023, In Pisaq, the dough for empanadas was made from seven or eight types of grains.

(The lady boss of the house wearing a black apron introduced herself: “I am a descendant of the king who built Machu Picchu more than four hundred years ago.”)

(The lady boss of the house held up the grain crops used in her empanadas one by one to show us and to explain.)

(The scene of everyone making empanadas around the big table for oneself and my two pies with the word “JS” in the rattan basket.)

Little Stories

A Story about Grace.
A Story about Lou.

In November 2023, I joined a 6-day group tour in Peru to see Machu Picchu (11-17 to 11-22) and had wonderful times：
a）The first day in South America by myself, I had a wonderful experience。
b）Unforgettable moment of chatting during Thanksgiving breakfast time in Cuzco Peru.

In early January 2019, I flew from the sunny California to very cold Massachusetts. Walking outside on a sunny day in Massachusetts, I felt the cold wind stabbing my face like many small needles which was very painful. I didn’t like to go out for a walk even during the day, and I didn’t think I would walk in the cold night of Massachusetts to ask for help. This is an airport story about different styles.

I drove my daughter to Boston airport to pick up her friend Shirah. Before leaving home, my daughter searched online in advance and learned that it would take about 30 minutes for international passengers arriving at Boston airport to pass through the customs.

When we arrived at the airport at 6:50pm, we saw Shirah’s flight had landed at 6:30pm. Thinking we could pick her up within 20 minutes, my daughter went in the arrivals hall to see Shirah and I sat in my car along the side of the street, waiting for them to come back soon.

There were two rows of cars, in total more than two dozen, waiting along the side of the street at the Boston airport, as some cars picked up their passengers and left, I moved a few feet and stopped for a while, then moved a few feet and stopped for a while again. I didn’t expect that my daughter and Shirah would come back only after more than an hour. I also didn’t expect that our car would not start after moving slowly for more than an hour, because the battery was dead.

I had to get out of the car, walk in the cold night, knock on the window of the cars waiting along the side of the street one by one asking for help. Seeing me approaching, the majority of the drivers in the cars shook their hands and refused to talk to me, only very few drivers rolled down their windows on a cold night for me. I told them: “The battery of my car is dead. Do you have a cable? Can you help to jump start my car?”

I passed by more than ten cars without engaging in conversation, asked a few drivers and got the help from two kind middle-aged ladies.

At this time, my daughter and Shirah came back. The kind ladies helped us jump start my car on a cold night, then my daughter got into the driver’s seat to start the engine. I learned to wait for the engine to run for one minute before disconnecting the jump cable.

On the way home, Shirah apologized for her delay in passing the Customs: “Because the government is shutting down, there are very few customs security agents and I had to wait in a very long line to pass the customs.”

The shutdown of the government impacted ordinary people like me in such unexpected way, which made me see the beauty of mankind and my own personal resilience that I don’t usually feel.

After that, we bought a charging line and a charging battery, just in case. We hope we are able to help others in the future.

In 2021, we did use our battery to help Rachel.

In 2021, Julia, one of my alumni from Shuguang middle school in Zigong, invited me to a Chinese Local Tourism Group. I once invited relatives and friends who had never been to Zigong to watch Zigong’s Lantern Show in Boston zoo, a group activity organized by her; I also took part in a lunch gathering at a Chinese restaurant owned by a Zigongian and recommended by her; I followed her journey to visit Gibbet Hill‘s autumn scenery too. I found Julia’s passion towards natural sceneries very attractive, as we are living in the same city that is far from our homeland. I could not help mentioning a discussion of how Robert can attract Francesca after watching the old film “Bridge of Madison County” a few weeks ago. In my opinion, Francesca, a lonely housewife who was far away from her hometown for a very long time, suddenly met a person who knew and really liked her hometown, this was the reason Robert was attractive to her at the beginning.

At 10 a.m. this morning, Julia, four other friends from the tourism group, and I met at the brand-new parking lot of Prospect Hill Park. We climbed the hill along the spacious paved road that was designed for cars but which was closed for cars that were entering now. In early spring on the East Coast, the trees on the hill were still lifeless and the road on weekdays was empty. The six of us. along with a couple who were walking a dog, only eight people and a dog walked on the road. While Lisa and Mary, ZZ and I, Jessica and Julia walked together, we breathed in and enjoyed the fresh air and quiet atmosphere of the well-maintained Prospect Hill Park.

The top of Prospect Hill is a good place to look at downtown Boston. When we climbed to the top, though the sun had not come out, the vision under the clouds was very clear, as the air was very clean and transparent. Standing at the top of the hill, I heard the sharp-minded Jessica sigh: “I feel like I’m in a science fiction blockbuster.” I was surprised because I couldn’t come up with such feeling; I was also delighted because I enjoyed sharing fresh new thoughts among friends.

After enjoying each other’s company for a while and after our muscles had warmed up, we shared each other’s birth years: 1960, 1963, 1964, 1965, 1971 and 1976. Then we complimented each other’s vibrant minds and active bodies, I felt the sincere praise exude a kind of sweetness and collecting it was just like a busy bee. I enjoyed the moment very much. In the United States, we all use English names now, but I like to ask after the former Chinese names of the born-in-60s, because I can understand the meaning of the born-in-60s’ Chinese names. When Lisa said that she now used English name even in China, I joked: “You were very modern then!”

We ran into a friendly Caucasian couple, Mary and John, at the top of the hill. After learning that we were all Chinese, John told us he had read the “A Dream of Red Mansions” and he liked Baoyu. I was very surprised to hear his comment on Daiyu: “She was a goddess.” as I felt the same here. The couple was curious about us too. When they heard Julia said: “I arrived in the United States just over a year.” John and Mary praised Julia: “Your English is very good! Do you like America?” We also learned that John is a lawyer and Mary is a social worker, that they work from home, and that they are on their work break.

While going down the hill on Sunset Trail, I stopped and pointed to a stretch of water in the distance and said, “look, that’s the Charles River.” “Why is the river so wide?” Someone questioned. “It should be the Cambridge reservoir.” “It’s the Cambridge reservoir, a beautiful place in autumn.” “Every time I pass there in autumn, I want to stop and go for a walk. but I could not find the parking lot.” “You can stop under the Cambridge bridge.” All of us focusing on the water in the distance made me understand that the wide water surface was not the Charles River at all. It was memorable!

Accompanied by mature similar age girlfriends, the open natural scenery and intimate chat made outdoor group activities more comfortable. ZZ and I met for the first time. While going down the hill together, we shared the timeline of our first landing in the U.S. from China: she came to the East Coast from Beijing in 1991 and I came to the East Coast from Zigong in 1989. We chatted about the hot topic of a Silicon Valley man which bursted out on March 14. We agreed that many OBC (Oversea-born Chinese) adults are paying great attention to this affair, and the vast majority of ABC (American-born Chinese) youngsters don’t care at all. Then we had a good time chatting about family, marriage and children. When we said good bye to each other, I forgot to give back her bottle of water that I carried all the way up the hill which she didn’t have a chance to drink. Well, we will meet again later.

Little Episodes

1. The science fiction blockbuster scenery commented by Jessica：

2. Chatting with Mary and John at the top of the hill：

3. Unseen views at the top of the hill as we are climbing:

4. Sharing the same passion and road，we are going down the hill：

5. Our joke of “Boundless world” and “Supremacy over all”:

6. The oil film “Bridge of Madison County”

In May 2021, a bush of bright yellow iris on the bank of Charles River caught my eye, as I rarely saw yellow iris and I had only seen iris on land, such as gardens, roadsides or hillsides. So I left the trail and stepped on the rocks to get closer to see the yellow iris. I felt that the yellow flowers were beautiful and graceful on the top of skinny long green leaves, with the high-rise buildings in the background,

After staying with the yellow flowers for a while and before leaving, I took some photos of the yellow iris. I shared a photo with my friend, MK, who claimed that he didn’t know much about flowers.

After I told MK: “The pretty yellow flowers are called irises.”

He immediately replied: “I am familiar with the name of iris. In my memory, iris is usually purple.”

I was surprised to hear his quick description of iris and agreed: “Yes, the yellow irises are rare.”

“I was reminded of the painting of iris by Van Gogh.” (MK)

Later I told MK, I grew up in Zigong, a small city with no public libraries or museums, therefore I knew very little about paintings. I only knew Van Gogh’s famous sunflower and his self-portrait.

Then he sent me a photo of the iris by Van Gogh. He seems liked iris a lot: “In Japan, the cherry blossom is the most popular flower. The iris may be the second most popular. Traditionally, beautiful women are often called iris.”

His explanation reminded me of my friend who named her daughter Iris, because my friend liked paintings of iris by Georgia O’Keeffe.

MK said later: “Iris, in Greek mythology, is a goddess who is the personification of the rainbow.”

It seems like iris is a popular and well known flower in both Japanese and Western culture. So I told MK: “Iris does not seem very popular in China. Because a poet, my classmate in college, once told me that the iris was too ordinary for a poem.”

MK said he understood there are some different views about iris between Chinese and Japanese, and probably Western traditions.

After thinking for a while, MK explained his hypothesis to me. “Very interesting! The difference might be related to that in the traditional perspective about the beauty of women. For example, I believe the concept of ‘傾城’ is quite unique to Chinese history and literature. I have never heard such a ‘傾城’ type of story in Japanese and Western history or literature, and anywhere else other than China. In Chinese tradition, we can say ‘傾城’ such as 楊貴妃, 西施 and 王昭君 is the prototype of beauties. BTW, they are famous in Japan, as well. To describe the beauty of these ladies, adjectives that came up to my head are ‘super-gorgeous’, ‘super-attractive’ and extraordinary (although unfortunately I haven’t gotten a privilege to see them in person!). I guess it is easier to find these features in 牡丹 (peony), which you told me is a symbol of beautiful women in China, compared to the iris. I guess this could be one of the reasons iris has not been one of the most popular flowers in China, unlike Europe and Japan.”

After hearing MK’s explanation, I thought a bit and realized that popular flowers in China are usually either in a round symmetric shape, such as the peony, rose, plum blossom, chrysanthemum, water lily, and camellia etc or possessing sweet fragrant, such as jasmine, fragrant orchid, and sweet-scented osmanthus etc. On the other hand, the native iris in China has a triangle shape with no fragrance. Therefore the is not very popular in China.

Footnote:
MK thought that a footnote will help explain why and how 傾城 is a concept unique to China:
傾城 (literary, figuratively) drop-dead gorgeous, extremely beautiful women (who may have the potential of bringing about the downfall of an empire, state, or city) (modified from Wiktionary) .
楊貴妃, 西施 and 王昭君 were typical and the most famous 傾城 in Chinese history.

Little Episodes

1.
This morning, I shared this story in my circle of friends: “Chatting about iris flowers brought out the differences between history and culture. People love flowers, and flowers please people. The culture and history of flowers please many people. I started the conversation of iris, because a poet, my classmate in college, once said to me that iris is too ordinary for a poem, which makes me feel sad as I like iris. After hearing my sadness, another friend who claimed he didn’t know much about flowers has many says about iris flowers.”
After reading my shared story, one of my high school alumna and a serious flower lover commented: “Because iris comes from the Greek word ‘Rainbow’, Westerners plant it in the cemetery, hoping iris becoming a medium for communication between dead and alive. This is something I read in an article before and I was very impressed. ”

2. Van Gogh’s iris paint。
On line comments: “Van Gogh captured the striking wildness of these flowers.”

3. The yellow iris I saw (05-22-2021)

4. Other story around iris in 2021:
Iris, Female Writers, Family Histories.
Yellow iris flowers.
Pretty iris flowers

5. Wiktionary and Wikipedia
“wiktionary is a dictionary written in one language and covering all words in all languages, just as Wikipedia is an encyclopedia written in one language of all topics from all language-areas.”

6. Xiaoyun, my elementary friend, also planted iris in her garden.
She said: iris is also called BianZhuGen in our home province Sichuan. Iris is bulb.

Alisa is my PhD advisor Prof. Barkatt’s wife.

In May, I told Alisa that I will write a story about her to wish her happy birthday, and the story started:

At the beginning of 2021, Alisa sent me a greeting card that was made by one of her students. The greeting card was a collage featuring Alisa’s signature infectious and sunny smile. I felt happy when I saw her smiling the same smile in the many photos.

A few days ago, while looking at old photos, I saw a picture of Alisa and myself in the laboratory in the summer of 1991. I was very impressed that Alisa’s smile remained unchanged even 30 years later.

Recently, I chatted with my daughter: “I spend much more time on the phone with Alisa than with Ronnie.”

My daughter said, “Because women like to chat.”

I thought for a moment and remembered that Alisa shared with me many news about our common friends in CUA in the early 1990s, such as Professor May (one of my PhD committee members) had passed away a few years ago. I responded: “I think it is because Alisa enjoys talking about people she knew and cared, a kind of small talk.”

I actually worked with Alisa in the same laboratory for about 3 years in the early 1990s. Even after over twenty years, her English with a German accent is still very familiar to my ears, and we can easily engage in long conversations. I suddenly realized that the impression of people on me did not correlate with the duration with which I had stayed with them.

As my advisor’s wife, Alisa was cheerful and cared about graduate students who were working with her in the same laboratory. I can’t remember that she ever scolded us. We often had lunch together, I ate a home-made big lunch, Alisa often ate a simple lunch, such as a small can of corn or a piece of bread… Sometimes, we went swimming together . Our friendship spanned generations.

In 1998, while visiting her Japanese friends in Silicon Valley, Alisa also visited me at our Chamberry house in San Jose, on a very hot summer afternoon. I remembered that I was in a very weak state then because I was still pregnant with my son with both my face and feet swollen and I always felt tired. When I saw Alisa I felt her caring about me and I wanted to cry. Alisa also brought my daughter a colorful wooden Easter egg, as my daughter was born in April.

I am grateful to Alisa for her caring nature and sweet smile, which have continued to quietly influence how I live my life now, because I felt that I am more outgoing, more talkative, more caring about people who I know, and more cheerful now.

Little Episodes

1. Alisa’ New Year greeting card in 2021

2. 07-10-1991, Alisa and I in our laboratory

3. In April 2021, Alisa wrote a memoir for her grandparents:

Grace is my daughter’s friend, they are both pursuing their PhD’s with a focus on ancient languages.

During the early quarantine period in April 2020, hair salons were closed, so I cut my hair by myself which made the end of my hair uneven. When I heard my daughter saying Grace will cut Shirah’s hair, I asked my daughter to check with Grace if she could cut my hair too.

Grace cut my hair, then she painted my nails very prettily. I said: “Grace’s hands are very skillful.”

My daughter said: “Grace’s class notes were so neat and beautiful, So of course she has skillful hands.”

I smiled: “Good hands, good heart.”

As the pandemic in 2020 isolated and distanced people a lots, it also created various opportunities for friends to become closer and know each other more. After Grace cut my hair and painted my nails, we became friends.

During the 2020 quarantine, Grace and her husband, Lou, started shopping for an old couple who both are professors and who are very close to us. Almost a year has passed since then.

One day in August 2020, Grace mentioned that Martha’s birthday was coming soon, Martha is one of the professors. I was curious and asked her how did she know Martha’s birthday. Grace said she remembered when we went their house in 2019 to celebrate Martha’s birthday in August last year.

I also remembered in August 2019, Grace, Lou, Shirah, my daughter, my son, and I went to their house to celebrate Martha’s birthday. However, I could not remember that Martha’s birthday is coming again at the same time this year. I thought that Grace is very attentive.

Because of Grace’s reminder, Grace, Shirah, Lou, and I brought flowers, homemade birthday cake, and Chinese style gifts to the professors’ front door. While keeping 6-feet social distance and wearing masks, we sang “Happy Birthday” to Martha and gave her the gifts.

That day, Martha was dressed in a sky-blue blouse paired with snow-white pants. It was a very modern outfit.

Martha happily said she did not get a chance to wear her new summer outfit yet and she was very happy to be able to wear her new summer outfit today.

In the autumn 2020 on Grace’s birthday, while wearing masks, we gathered outside of the professors’ house again. Martha prepared desserts, champaign, and a birthday card, we celebrated Grace’s birthday together.

During the 2020 pandemic, the same people at the same place had two unique sweet small birthday celebrations kept a sweet story about Grace.

Little Episodes

1. In June 2020, Grace painted our nails.
Good time, retiree, enjoying spending time with younger people.
Painting nails, my age made me self-conscious about the color of my nails.
Tasting delicious food, Lou is a good chef.

2. In August 2020, Grace, Shirah, Lou, and I went together to celebrate Martha’s birthday.

Happy Birthday. Wishing the professor happy birthday.
Birthday cake, Shirah made it.
Summer flowers, I picked it.
6-feet social distance, we kept it.
Birthday girl said: “I haven’t had a chance to wear my new summer outfit, summer is almost gone. Today I finally got a chance to wear it.”

3. In autumn 2020, Grace, Shirah, Lou, and I gathered outside of the professors’ house again. Martha prepared desserts, champaign, and a birthday card for Grace.