Today is another rainy day. While sitting by the window watching the rain, I thought of one of the joys of this Chinese New Year, taking a morning walk with my daughter on a cloudy day.

The fifth day of this Chinese New Year is Sunday, my two grandchildren who don’t usually go to the daycare on Sunday will go because Teacher K is free this Sunday, also because they didn’t go Friday! My daughter suggested we visit the San Jose Rose Garden after dropping the babies, I replied: “The roses haven’t bloomed yet, and it is cloudy. Let’s take a walk at the nearby Lake Cunningham Park.”

I was in a rush before going out in the morning and didn’t wear a windbreaker. My daughter only noticed it while driving. She was worried that I would catch a cold if I went for a walk while wearing so little, so I said, “I’ll be warm after a walk, or we can go home get a windbreaker, after dropping the babies.”

Once we arrived at Teacher K’s house, my grandchildren went to play with their favorite toys immediately, and my daughter said to K: “Do you have a thick coat to borrow? As my mother doesn’t have a windbreaker and we are planning to go for a walk in Lake Cunningham Park on the way home.” K went to her closet and brought out five coats for me to choose from. Her thoughtfulness made me happy and my daughter’s flexibility also made me happy. I was in a good mood before I even went for the walk. I picked a beige windbreaker that fit me well. After my daughter thanked K, we left and drove to Lake Cunningham Park. The parking lots there were all empty.

After my daughter parked the car, I took her to the trail along the lake for a walk. At 9:30 on a Sunday morning, there were very few people on the lakeside trail. The occasional runners, dog walkers, and bicycle riders were probably people who really liked outdoor activities, except for the two of us who came early because we had to send the babies to daycare.

I actually like to sleep in. Some time ago, I read a small post saying that it is good for the physical and mental health of the elderly not to sleep in and get up on time in the morning. I thought of my father who went to bed and got up early and was in good health, and thought of how before he passed away at almost 93 years old, he could still read and wrote articles online every day. I started to get up early and on time since then. Although I haven’t felt the benefits of not sleeping in, I think it won’t hurt to stick to it. Maybe it will show health benefits in ten years. I feel the familiar “have an immediate effect” lifestyle is really fading away for me now.

While walking on the lakeside trail, we looked at the lively ducks, geese, and seagulls on the water, I told my daughter: “In the summer, you can see small fish in the water and turtles basking in the sun on the rocks.” We continued walking along the lake, and a while later, my daughter said she saw a turtle sticking its head out of the water, but unfortunately I didn’t see it.

After the turtle, I can’t help but remember Walden Pond in Massachusetts, a place where my daughter and I often went for walks. According to Wikipedia, Walden Pond is a famous example of a kettle hole, it was formed by retreating glaciers 10,000–12,000 years ago. Walden Pond attracts more tourists because of a leading transcendentalist, Henry David Thoreau’s book “Walden”. Once when we were walking on the waterside under the slope next to the railway, my daughter said she saw a turtle floating on the water. I followed the direction she pointed and saw a big green turtle over a foot long. I was very surprised to see such a big turtle. After that, every time we passed that section of water, we always stopped and took a closer look at the water, unfortunately we never saw the green turtle again. At that time, my daughter was single and now she is a mother of two kids, and we also had been away from Massachusetts for almost three years. Time flies!

We passed an open field with fitness equipment and came to the dock. As I like chairs under the shade, I pointed to the chair under the tree by the lake and said: “Look, the chair under the tree is very popular in the summer because of the shade.” The bankside of lake my grandson Ben and I once watched the ducks is gone because the water level of the lake is high during the rainy season. While watching the vanished bank under the dark clouds, I saw many seagulls taking off and landing on the lake, I feel it is lively here.

We changed the route at the end of the lakeside trail and walked to the water playground, which has been renamed CaliBunga Waterpark after switching owners in 2024. The parking lot there is also empty because it is closed in the winter. My daughter still remembers the happy times she and her brother went to the Ranging Waters, used to be called. She said that she will take Ben back to visit the old place in the near future because children love to play in the water.

It took less than an hour to walk a large circle in the park, we felt very relaxed and not tired. On the way to the parking lot, I asked my daughter to take a few photos for me.

The photo captured the cloudy sky on Sunday morning, the empty parking lot, my joy after a walk, K’s beige double-layer buttons windbreaker, and the pink scarf I knitted for my daughter when she was in middle school. This scarf has been with me from California to Massachusetts, and from Massachusetts back to California. The color and texture remain the same, and the memories are clear. It is a souvenir with manyfamily stories.

On rainy days, staying at home is a good time for replaying the fun of walking and chatting with my daughter and the thoughts triggered by it! At age 60, I pray for family harmony and purposeful unity.

Little Episodes

In September 2023, I spent a day at Lake Cunningham Park and watched the sunset before going home, and I started to like this park, and wrote a story。

In March 2021, it was still winter at Walden Pond, we walked on a downhill trail covered with ice, though it was very difficult to walk there, we still finished walking a circle around the pond, and here is the story.

In December 2020, I went for a walk at the snow covered Walden Pond, the peaceful scenery led me to enjoy the rich sounds of nature more story.

In September 2020, we went for a morning walk at Walden Pond, which was full with the COVID-19 pandemic atmosphere. Here is the story.

Hi Eileen and Qingzi,

Thanks for arranging the trip for me, I enjoyed my first day in Lima very much! I met five people and had a great experience with them.

The first: the driver who picked me up

The flight was about an hour later than the scheduled time, right after I got out of customs, I saw a lady with a “CostSaveer” sign and she drove me to the hotel, which is about 20 km, which took her more than 40 minutes as the traffic was bad.

While driving, we chatted about her family, COVID, and Peru. She is a freelancer and has two daughters are 12 and 13. They play volleyball at school, which is far from their home, so the girls need to take a public bus to school daily and school time is 7:30 to 2:00. She went to a special language school to learn English and she speaks very good American English. COVID hit Peru badly, one of her relatives, very health, over 80 years old, passed away during the delta wave of COVID. Her family of four all got three doses of Pfizer. Her husband and one of their daughters had fever when they were positive, but she and another daughter had no symptoms. She grew up in a Catholic family, but she doesn’t practice in religion now, both of her daughters have no religion at all. She told me the popular sports in Peru are soccer and volleyball. Peru has more than ten parties, three are strong parties, there is an election every five years. She introduced two local dishes to me, one is potato, another is beef. She said she cooks them at home but not as good as the restaurant.

The second: Edduar, the waiter

The waiter who suggested both the cocktail and the main dish for me. Passion fruit cocktail and Ceviche tradic (raw fish marinated in lemon juice). I liked the cocktail.

The third and the fourth: Barbel and Henry, a couple from Borken

The couple sat on the next table, they asked about my Cevishe tradic, then Barbel suggested I have before and after meal photos, so her husband took the photos for me. After I finished my meal I described to them how I felt about the raw fish: I only felt the tender texture of raw meat without flavor, as the lemon and onion are strong, covering the fish taste, unlike sushi raw fish which is delicious.

As they drank beer, I was having cocktail, and the alcohol made us very chatty. I told them I have two grandchildren and I am on vacation from them (as Eileen taught me). I showed them both Ben and Meimei’s photo. Then Henry showed me photos of their family (30s son, pursuing a master degree, with his girlfriend, 28s daughter, physical therapy like her mother, with her boy friend, 20s daughter, a dog trainer, with her girlfriend and their golden retriever), his late father, his mother in nursery, and his older brother and younger sister,

Both of them came form families with three siblings, each side family in their generations have total eight children. Barbel is part time physical therapist and Henry is a handyman for plumbing. They have been retried for three years, and have traveled to many places.

This is their 18-day private tour trip with a guide for just the two of them.

At the end, we had desserts together, and exchanged email and want to keep in touch happily like children. Then, Henry said that he was a CEO for over a thousand people company; he worked 7 days a week for almost 40 years and never had the time to take care of their children; while working, he never told anyone about his family. I told him that one of my daughter’s professors also said that he started to tell little life stories in the class after he was 70 years old.

I told them I am a blogger, and I worked at eBay during its early stage.

The fifth: Daniel, the taxi driver

The taxi driver who drove me to the Magic Water Circuit. He asked for S40 of the local currency to drive me there, I bargained it down to S35. Then he offered to wait for me there for an hour, but don’t charge me for the hour, then send me back to the hotel.

He doesn’t speak English, so he talk to google translator then I read the English text version to understand him.

One the way back, he talked a lot and passed the English text version to me. It is about the national soccer stadium. I was confused, but he was very insistent on telling me and pointing to a building next to the circuit. Finally I realized he want to me to see the national soccer stadium. I immediately looked back at the the national soccer stadium big building in the dark and said thanks!

For the back trip, I gave him S42, S7 as his tip, and he was very happy. He then told me his name is Daniel.

Little Episodes

1. My lunch time.
Edduar, the waiter:

My left front view at lunch：

My right side view at lunch：

Ceviche recommended by Edduar：

The photo of before the meal (taken by Henry)：

The photo of after meal (taken by Henry)：

Our desserts：

2. Tunnel Fountain of Surprises in the Magic Water Circuit:

3. The traffic jam on my way back to the hotel：

谢谢你们为我安排的这个旅程。

今天还没有开团，我在利马的第一天独自随意漫游，在乘车、吃饭、看景时偶遇了五位人，有了近距离交流。

第一位：接我的女司机

航班上午九点过抵达利马机场，我顺利出关后就看到一位女士举着一张“CostSaver”的纸，知道她是安排来接我去旅馆的人。从机场到旅馆二十多公里的车程，她开了四十多分钟，因为车多路窄。

我们一路闲聊她、她的家人、COIVD疫情、和秘鲁。她是一个自由职业者，有两个12，13岁的女儿。孩子们每天坐公交车上学，上学时间是早上7:30到下午2:00，她们在学校喜欢打排球。女司机说一口流利的美式英文，她说不是在学校学的，是自费去一个特殊的英文学校学的。COVID疫情中秘鲁死了好多人，她有一位80多岁很健康的亲属在疫情Delta高潮时去世了。她一家四口都及时打了几针Pfizer疫苗（免费），但都阳过；先生和她的一个女儿发高烧有症状，但她和另一位女儿没有症状。她在一个天主教家庭长大，但她现在不去教堂，她的两个女儿不信教。她还告诉我秘鲁人很喜欢足球和排球，秘鲁有十多个党派，三个比较强大，秘鲁每五年举行一次总统选举。她给我推荐了两个秘鲁菜：一个是土豆，另一个是牛肉。她说她在家也做这两个菜，但是没有餐馆的好吃。

第二位： Edduar，餐馆服务生

我下午三点后才能入住旅馆，把行李存放在旅馆后还不到十一点，问过旅店前台后就走路去海边找本地特色餐饮店。

因为11:30才开始提供午餐，海边山坡上的露天餐厅很空，我挑了一个两边临海有阳伞的角落餐桌坐下。

（我左前方的风景）

（我右边的风景）

我告诉服务生我是第一次来秘鲁，希望他推荐一杯饮料和一份当地特色主食；他听不懂，就换成会英文的Edduar来为我服务。

（Edduar）

Edduar听完我的要求后，推荐了百香果鸡尾酒和Ceviche(柠檬汁腌生鱼块)，我完全采纳了。

第三和四位：德国Borken的Barbel和Henry夫妇

我的鸡尾酒送来后不久，右边的餐桌来了一对夫妇，也是Edduar为他们服务。我比他们先到，就扭头有礼貌地和他们交换了笑。我很喜欢百香果鸡尾酒。当我的主食送来后，他们好奇地问我的主食是什么，我说是服务生推荐的本地特色柠檬汁腌生鱼块。Barbel建议我拍张餐前和餐后照，我把手机递给坐在我侧对面的Henry，他给我拍了餐前照。我吃完午餐，又请Henry拍了餐后照。

（我的餐前照）

（我的餐后照）

我随即给他们描述了我吃柠檬汁腌生鱼块的感觉以示谢意：“我只吃出了生鱼软软绵绵的肉质感，没有吃到寿司生鱼片那种鲜味，因为柠檬汁和洋葱的味道太强了。”

他们在喝啤酒，我在喝鸡尾酒，酒精让我们健谈。我告诉他们我退休了，从照顾两个孙子中休假（艾琳刚教我的一句英文：“I am on vacation from them”。艾玲解释them是我的外孙，因为我已经退休了。）我给他们看了小冰和妹妹的照片，Henry也给我看了他们的全家福：Barbel和Henry，30岁的儿子和女朋友；28岁的女儿，和妈妈一样是个理疗师，和男朋友；20岁的女儿，一个驯狗师，和女朋友以及她们的金毛猎犬。我们交流了孩子的情况之后，Henry又给我看了他过世的父亲、在养老院里的母亲、以及他一家三兄妹的照片。

Barbel是半职理疗师，Henry是一个水管修理师。他们退休三年多，已经去好多地方旅游过。这次的南美洲18天游请了一个私人导游是因为他们不懂西班牙语。

我们聊得很投机后一起吃甜点，合影，交换电子信箱，像小孩子结交了新朋友一样开心。

（我和Barbel和Henry夫妇一起吃的餐后甜点）

最后Henry说他退休前是一个有一千多员工公司的CEO，他在过去的四十年里每周工作七天，没有时间照顾孩子，他退休前从来没有给旁人聊过自己的家庭。我告诉他，我女儿的一位已经退休的老教师也说过他七十岁之后上课才喜欢给学生讲一些生活小故事。

第五位：Daniel，出租车司机

Daniel晚上开车送我去喷泉公园的出租车司机。他不会说英语，我不会西班牙语，我们通过他手机上的谷歌语音翻译App把口语翻译成文字，进行阅读理解交流。他开口要价40索尔（Sol）单程，我讨价到35索尔。随后他提出可以在喷泉公园外等我一个小时不收费，然后送我回旅馆。

（利马市的喷泉公园夜景）

在刚接上我回旅馆的路上，他对着App说了好多，然后把翻译的英文文字递给我。看着关于国家足球馆的文字，我不明白地摇摇头。但是他却很激动地一边说一边指着公园旁边的一个建筑物。最后，我明白他是想让我看看秘鲁的国家足球馆，我扭头看着夜幕中那足球馆大建筑，连声说：“谢谢，谢谢，我看到了！”我下车前给了他42索尔（7索尔小费），他说他叫Daniel。

（Daniel开车送我回旅馆的路况：拥挤）

故事小花絮

2021年6月，因为疫情隔离的缘故，这是一年多以后Grace，Lou，Alex，和我第一次在室内与寿星T教授相聚为他过生。T教授说：“70岁以后，我上课时开始讲一些生活小故事了，以前没有过的事。”那天的故事。

On Saturday night, my friends and my family had a dinner at a western style restaurant.

It is only the beginning of December but the restaurant is already filled with holiday spirit: dress-up guests took photos next to the Christmas tree in the hall from time to time and the walls of the restaurant were decorated with Christmas ornaments.

We were led to a separate room with two rows of long tables. A long table was already filled with food, and a group of people in casual holiday clothes were eating. They looked happy and talked very loudly.

After we sat down at another empty long table, a tall man in a Christmas hat at the next table got up and came to us. He put his arms on the backs of two chairs and bent down to greet us: “Happy holidays! We are graduated from Overfelt High School in 1970, and we are here to celebrate the 50th anniversary of high school graduation. Because of COVID, our celebration was postponed for two years. We may be a bit loud so please forgive us.” Hearing what he said, we immediately felt the noise at the next table was like entertainment to us. We started to guess the age of the people at the next table: they graduated from high school in 1970, based on how people usually graduate from high school at the age of 18, most of them should have passed age 70 already. Watching the old classmates of more than 50 years ago together, talking, laughing, singing and applauding, a few of us who were born in the 60′s in China couldn’t help admiring the passion, vitality, cohesion and organization of this group of old classmates.

The waitress who served us was a tall and fit middle-aged beauty. She quickly sent our orders to the kitchen and appeared to be very efficient. While waiting for the main course, we finished a basket of free bread, and asked the busboy for the second basket of bread. When we finished the second basket of bread, the waitress came to tell us: “Sorry, because there are many small parties tonight, and the kitchen is busy and your orders will be late.”

While waiting for the food, I was not hunger because I ate a lot of free bread; I didn’t feel bored at all because of the singing, laughter, and applause at the next table. After chatting with my son sitting next to me and my friend Ann sitting across the table for a while, I looked at Ben, my grandson who was sitting on the high chair at the front of the long table from afar. I, in silence for a long time, enjoyed the sight of him behaving calmly while being exposed to a group of strangers with loud voices. Attracted by the singing and applause at the next table, Ben looked around curiously from time to time, and the ladies sitting against the wall at the next table praised the curious and quiet Ben with thumb-up from time to time.

Before the end of the party at the next table, someone suggested that everyone stand up and say a sentence begin with “I am thankful for”. At this time, our food was not served yet. I turned my attention to these old classmates and watched them stand up and say, “I am thankful for…” one by one: “I am thankful for my family and children.” “I am thankful for your friendship.” “I am thankful that my parents are healthy, my mother is 104 and my father is 96 this year.” “I am thankful that the Lord is with me.” “I am thankful that I still have love in my heart.” “I am thankful for my children, my grandchildren, and my great grandchildren.” Everyone got warm applause before sitting down. When the waitress started to serve us food, she overheard “my mother is 104″ so she asked me curiously: “Is that 104 year old mother here tonight?” I said: “No, tonight is her son’s high school reunion.” All of us were amazed about having great grandchildren around age of 70, because there must be a generation age gap less than 20 in these four generations.

After finishing their round of “I am thankful for”, a lady came by and said to me: “Sorry, we are so loud tonight. Do you want to know why we were so loud?” I nodded immediately. She smiled and said: “If we didn’t talk so loudly, many of us will fall asleep while sitting.” I laughed loudly after hearing what she said. I couldn’t help looking at this thoughtful and witty intellectual lady. Her body is full, she is dressed in a low cut tight black sweater, wearing a double breasted pearl necklace with a pair of matching pearl earrings; her face is round, she is wearing a pair of black rimmed glasses with brown and yellow short hair, sweet and elegant.

When we left our table, there were still many people chatting at the next table. Before we got out of the restaurant, we saw several people who had left their table earlier were drinking and dancing at the bar. They were really a group of living old urchins. I can’t help thinking of their jokes at the dinner table. A man asked the man who got up and ready to say “I am thankful for” to turn around, then slapped the man’s butt that was towards the table and said: “Look at this. This was the cutest butt in our yearbook that year.” The man seems to proud of himself and said:”I used it well.” There was a burst of laughter. A man recalled an old time story: “I had a motorcycle at that time. I wanted to take the pretty girl who always wore a miniskirt, but I took you.” The man then put his hands around a woman’s shoulder and said: “Before we arrived to your house, you asked me to turn off the engine, because you didn’t want your mother to know that you came back on a motorcycle.” Another burst of laughter. Because I have learnt that this was a high school reunion with family members or partners. Listening to the interesting memories they shared, I feel that this reunion with family members or partners told the ordinary oldness wanted to share their past happiness with people close to them.

After back home, I thought about how “I am thankful for” at the age of 70′s reunion was all about ordinary things. I guess it was the common mentality of ordinary oldness: to thankful for their family, their friendship, their healthy family tree, and their firm beliefs.

Little Episodes

（Celebrate the 50th anniversary of high school graduation. Because of COVID, the celebration was postponed for two years. ）

（The dinning room was filled with holiday spirit.)

（The dinning room was filled with holiday spirit. While Hearing “Jingle bell time is a swell time”, Ben is following his daddy clapping his hands.）

（Christmas decorations on the wall at the restaurant.）

今年八月初，我在跑步时无意中发现路边别人家的木栏杆外的杂草丛中有星星点点亮丽的紫色花影，就好奇地止步下蹲细看，原来杂草丛中一笼野生的土人参有几朵含苞欲放的花儿和有好多花苞。我用手托着随风摇晃着的土人参枝干拍了几张有花苞的照片，因为这是我离开老家自贡后第一次看到摸到我喜欢的这小众花草。此后，我跑步就多了一个乐趣：跑去蹲在路边看看土人参花自醉，因为那花里有儿时的清欢。

我以为我能这样跑步赏花到深秋，因为硅谷的秋天很暖和而土人参花期在春秋之间，没想这笼土人参花在八月底被当成杂草铲掉了。

花殇，为土人参花，我认真地寻找她，于我，独特的魅力。

10岁的眼光

我第一次见到土人参花在上世纪70年代初的碉堡山上；邻居的一个破烂的搪瓷盆里种的土人参开花时，不到十岁的我喜欢在那里从上往下慢看一尺左右高的土人参，看细细的土人参枝干随意地分叉，看细枝头上亮紫色的小花（直径大约2.5厘米），也看细枝头上有光泽亮晶晶的浅黄到赤红的小果子（直径大约1.5厘米）。在衣着普遍灰蓝、只有黑白照片、也没有电视机的色彩单一年代，我被土人参花精巧艳丽的天然美打动。土人参花和果曾为我的童年带来色彩斑斓的极境，也让她的美丽铭刻心底，虽然离开碉堡山我就没有见过此花。

55岁的心情

我再见土人参花照片是在2020年7月下旬，我已经55岁了。

2020年夏天刚来，因为COVID疫情初期的恐慌，我遇到听到比过去更多的不友好事件。

2020年7月下旬是三年全球疫情的初期，好多国际留学生在上完网课后被迫滞留在学校，因为好多国际航班停飞；女儿和儿子五月中旬放假后等到七月中旬才飞去加州，因为美国国内航班也很少；还有对疫情的无可奈何而突发大念“平安经”的现象，以及我夏天回国陪爸爸的计划泡汤；这一切都让我焦虑又想有点作为。于是我决定在女儿去加州的空档时把她住的地下室的天花板重新装修，让她的居住环境更好一点。

在大波士顿难求的装修师傅到家里来实地考察后说：“需要把地下室的东西都挪走后才能开工。这是一个小项目，一个周末就能完成。越快开工越好，因为不知道什么时候会更忙。”

正在读博士的女儿有好多厚厚的书都放在地下室，其中有几十册从德国搬回来的专业书，纸张好、分量重。我赶在周末前把所有书从地下室搬到楼上，又把床用厚厚的布罩上，装修师傅在周末顺利开工完工，然后我又清理装修后尘土厚厚的地下室。这短短几天的疲劳损伤让我深深体会到伤筋动骨一百天的痛苦，也唤醒2018年夏天我为陪女儿而东迁前一个人搬家的辛苦。

身体痛苦加上记忆辛苦再搭上大环境疫情困惑时，我看到自贡的小表妹分享的一张土人参花的照片突然哭了，当时我也不太明白我为什么会哭。

在麻州那几年时，我常和二姐，我在成都狮子山上同寝室四年的大学室友，小聚闲聊分享细腻的感受，我有一次特意把那土人参花照片给二姐看并告诉她：“我没想到我见到这土人参花的照片会哭。”二姐说：“我还没有这种见到花想哭的经历。”我说：“我也是第一次见到儿时喜欢的花哭了。”

今天，带着花殇的心情翻阅2020年7月下旬的文字和照片，回个头再问我为什么会见到土人参花哭泣，我似乎更理解自己当时的行为。见到亮丽的土人参花就像遇上老朋友，花知道我儿时丰富的幻想动力，花也看到了我半百困境的无助失落；面对土人参花我以为我是面对几十年前就知我懂我的朋友，无需言语直接落泪：为在麻州独自搬东西的苦唤醒在加州独自大搬迁的苦落泪，为疫情不可预测引发的大念“平安经”的无奈无助落泪。想起读过的常识：“视觉带来的大脑反应比听觉带来的更慢，因为视觉收集的信息比听觉收集的更丰富，大脑需要更长的时间来处理视觉带来的极其丰富信息。” 看到土人参花后唤醒的四十多年前的绚丽美好，对比2020年当时身处困境的无助无奈，这强烈反差是花为我秘制的一枚释放压抑的催泪丸，让我落泪让我释怀。

这是继2022年复活节前的周六，在德国维尔茨堡官邸花园他乡花为媒浪费好时光逗留一整天随军享受到登峰造极动态的“花悦人”之后，老天对花痴我的又一大恩赐！花殇，为土人参花，我悟出在压抑时花悦人让我以泪释放的花愈人疗效。

花 是深陷困境的知心老友
花 是孤独游客的他乡故人
花 是索然无味的生活亮点
花 是表达友情的暖人信物
花 是永葆青春的心中情人

土人参花果

1. 2023年从8月4日起，我跑步时常去赏花和景。可惜8月29日花被当杂草铲了。我记录的土人参花和景：

2. 六天的土人参花和景集：

3. 2023年8月，离开老家自贡四十多年后再一次看到摸到土人参花的喜悦：

（2023年8月4日，【周五乐】下午慢跑两英里，偶遇几株土人参花，惊喜若狂！儿时喜欢的花儿，离开自贡后就没见过，今天在烈日下路边阴凉地见到了，此乃宝地，真爱撩人，周五快乐！）

2020年7月的气氛

1. 2020年7月22日，庆祝生日。

（2020年7月22日，周三庆祝滞留在此无法回家的国际留学生的25岁生日。）

(2020年7月22日，给女儿的电子邮件：艾琳，买气球的经历很开心，我先走去Hanna ford，看到很少几个气球；接着走去Walgreen，一个气球都没有。我最后开车去Market Baskets选了一个粉红色的小气球。我问一个小男孩店员有没有大的喜庆的生日气球。他非常热心地四处打听，拿到钥匙打开放气球的储存柜取出还没有吹气的好多图案的气球让我选。我最终选了这个很喜庆的生日气球，和你今年送我的母亲节气球一样大。我感谢了那小男孩并告诉他这个生日气球是送给一个无法回家的女孩。你可以告诉她这个故事。哦，你的车子已经换油也换了后车闸。
Hi Eileen,
Buying balloon is a joyful journey. First, I walked to Hanna ford, saw very few selections of birthday balloons. Then I came to Walgreen, it had none.
I drove to Market Baskets, found a small pink birthday balloon. I asked a boy assistant if there are other big nice birthday balloons? He went to extra steps to help me: asking around, getting the key to look for unpopped balloons in storage. Finally, I got this very nice birthday balloon, the same size as my Mother’s Day balloon. I thanked him and told him this balloon is for a girl who could not go back to home during this special time.
You can tell this to XXXX later. Hope this make you happy.
Love,
Mom
Oh, your car had engine oil changed and also replaced rare brake.）

2. 2020年7月25日，独自腾空地下室后，装修师傅在周末来做天花板了：

3. 2020年7月26日，【土人参】土人参花，我小时候喜欢的一种家常花，离开自贡后就没见过了；今天在小表妹的分享里再见。几十年后，隔着大洋、小花唤醒花痴儿时的清欢。啊，真爱撩人缠绵！

4. 2020年7月30日，【懒人经】夏天懒惰灵机一动，一尺多长的排骨裹起来煲汤，省略钝刀割肉和洗刷菜板的无聊。这比《平安经》实在多了。

（补注：这时我因搬东西造成的腰痛异常厉害，也是三年疫情期大念《平安经》的高潮。我手脚不灵活心情欠佳又想喝滋补营养汤，自我调侃裹起排骨煲汤的懒人经比平安经更实在，一吐我的信念：吃好、心情好、身体恢复好。）

5. 2020年8月1日，【走一走】今天天气好，约上二姐附近走走。没赶上Walden Pond的开放时间，改签去了Fresh Pond。在人高的洋姜花丛中陶醉，人生有一个第一次。

（补注：疫情期，一切封闭式的娱乐设施场所都关门，大自然风景的Walden Pond也限量，我们开车去看到Walden Pond的停车场很空但已经关了。）

土人参123

网摘：“土人参（Talinum paniculatum (Jacq.) Gaertn.）是土人参科土人参属一年生或多年生草本植物。主根粗壮，圆锥形，有少数分枝，皮黑褐色，断面乳白色；茎直立，肉质，圆柱形；肉质叶互生或近对生，短柄或近无柄；淡紫红色花瓣，长椭圆形、倒卵形或椭圆形；蒴果近球形，坚纸质有光泽；花期在夏季与秋季之间；果期在秋季与冬季之间。土人参因是土人参科一年生草本植物栌兰的根而命名土人参。

土人参含有丰富的蛋白质、脂肪、钙、维生素等营养物质，土人参嫩茎叶品质脆嫩、爽滑可口，可炒食或做汤。肉质根可凉拌，宜与肉类炖汤，药膳两用。根、叶均可食用，营养丰富，口感嫩滑，风味独特，药蔬兼用，是近年来新兴起的一种叶菜类蔬菜。”

故事小花絮

2022年复活节前的周六，在德国维尔茨堡官邸花园他乡花为媒浪费好时光逗留一整天随即享受到登峰造极动态的“花悦人”故事。

2020年夏天刚来，因为COVID疫情初期的恐慌，我遇到听到比过去更多的不友好事件。

2020年7月下旬，女儿和儿子去加州后，我一个人把地下室搬空以便装修师傅换天花板换，然后又清理装修完毕后的地下室，体会到伤筋动骨一百天的故事。

我和二姐在麻州的故事。

我们住了近二十年的家，在碉堡山上，那里留下好多儿时的记忆。

五月中旬，女儿一家三口探亲三个礼拜回来后，女儿高烧不退，凌晨两点进急诊室测出COVID阳了；随后小外孙小冰和他爸爸Alex就陆续发高烧也阳了。恢复最快的是小外孙，他发烧三天就好了；我没有发烧，耳朵痛了一周；Alex高烧了两天，烧退了就开始咳嗽，咳嗽了一个多月。

五月下旬，Alex因为白天黑夜都咳嗽去诊所看大夫，大夫检查了说肺功能很好，就给他开一个处方消炎药止咳。

六月初，Alex又打电话给大夫说处方消炎药吃完了，咳嗽没有缓解，大夫又给他开了另一种处方消炎药。结果吃完第二种处方消炎药后咳嗽还是很频繁，非处方的川贝止咳糖浆和Delsym cough syrup也没效果。因为咳嗽太严重说话有困难，Alex的老板终止了他俩的一对一，说等Alex恢复后再一对一。

想起多年前我在职场时与老板的一对一是一个很重要机会，我觉得这咳嗽也许会影响Alex的工作。还有小外孙女七月中旬就要降生了，到时候如果大人咳小人哭会很麻烦。我开始找朋友打听硅谷的好中医，希望中医能开几副中药止咳，因为西药都没能止咳。好几个朋友说：“硅谷的中医好找，但好中医不好找。”最后也没有去看中医。

我询问的朋友中有一位去台湾阳了返美后也咳嗽不止，她说美国大夫也给她开过两种处方消炎药止咳。久病成医的朋友说：“COVID阳后的好多症状都没有教科书式的医疗方案，大夫也是在探索中，才会给病人不同的消炎药试一试。四月份大夫给我开的两种处方消炎药都没吃完，因为我觉得吃药后没有什么效果。”

她问了好多Alex咳嗽的症状：白天黑夜都咳嗽，觉得是嗓子有痰感到痒才咳嗽，痰是白色等等之后说：“我的症状也差不多，但是我不用咳嗽就会吐白痰。我自己慢慢观察觉得这种咳嗽要少吃冰冷的食物和凉性的水果。”

想到Alex每天要吃几个橙子，我就问：“橙子属于凉性吗？”

“橙子是凉性的，柚子比橙子更凉，要少吃。”

朋友最后说：“我觉得坚持早晚用盐水漱口漱喉咙可缓解抑止咳嗽。”

Alex没有去看中医，但不再吃橙子了，每天早晚都坚持用盐水漱口漱喉咙。

我们一起去英伟达酒吧庆祝儿子学期结束时，Alex还咳嗽频繁，那是六月十四日。两周后的七月一日，我们去Carmel-by-the-Sea时他几乎不咳了。

(女儿让我买一种非处方西药止咳，Alex吃了这药也不管用。）

五月中旬，女儿一家三口探亲三个礼拜回来几天后就陆续发烧，咳嗽，测出COVID阳了；恢复最快的是小外孙，发了三天的烧就好了。

三人都阳了之后，我很自信地告诉女儿：“不用担心我！你们探亲的三周我在家养精蓄锐，身体状态很好！还有你们都阳了，我在心理上的免疫力应该很强！”

结果我很快也出症状感觉到特别疲乏。我不发烧，也没有失去食欲和味觉，但嗓子肿疼吞咽难受、浑身无力肌肉酸痛，脑袋像装着一滩浆糊，左耳轮会突然扎心的痛，这些症状持续了快一周。最让我无法忍受的是电波冲击般突如其来扎心的左耳轮阵痛，我痛得想在左耳轮上开个洞；我想相对于那神兮兮的阵痛，我应该更能承受耳轮受伤的肌体痛！

听说阳了要多休息别洗澡，因为洗澡消耗体力，我生病后就没洗澡；只吃了一些Advil，也坚持喝了大蒜酒。女儿提醒我去冲个热水澡也许会感觉好一点。我做了很大的努力才去冲了一个热水澡。很奇，冲完澡后的第二天，左耳轮阵痛突然消失了。

我问过好多阳过的友人，他们都没有左耳轮扎心阵痛的症状。带着好奇，我在网上提问学习。第一，“为什么左耳轮一阵一阵剧痛？”，答案没有我认可的解释；最模凌两可的解释是耳轮阵痛可能是神经混乱了，也许我的心脏（左耳离心脏近）或大脑（脑袋像装着一滩浆糊）的神经混乱导致了左耳轮阵痛，我喜欢这个自圆其说。第二，“耳轮阵痛与新冠病相关吗？”，答案是无关；我听说过新冠病毒让人的自身免疫系统失调，我猜也许神经混乱和免疫系统失调在根本上是一回事；我坚持喝大蒜酒，想到大蒜能让自身免疫系统处于最佳状态发挥应有的作用，也许这酒对左耳轮阵痛的消失也有帮助？

接近一周神兮兮的左耳轮扎心阵痛和疲乏酸软的肌体痛彻底改变了我对自身健康的自信。三周的养精蓄锐在病毒面前可以是不堪一击，所谓的心理上格外的抵抗力也抵不过病毒攻击，岁月不饶人就是这样让痛来得莫名其妙又难以承受。

生病之后，我意识到我的健康老本大概是用光了，以后要更重视养心养身减少受病痛折磨的机会。

小插曲

1. 生病疲乏无力，居家五天，微信也停了五天（5月22日与5月28日之间空白）。

看多了美西海岸线的险峻，我觉得美东的海岸线很平淡。

小镇五日游，慢节奏漫游的精彩中有细腻深沉的人文人情火花。

今天周六，是我们在巴尔港小镇的最后一个早晨。早上八点半，我在旅店的前厅拿了一个香蕉、一个蓝莓饼和一杯咖啡就计划漫步到渔人码头最后一次享受那里的风情。当路过我们第一天光临的海边路口时，我改主意拐进路口的海边。我惊讶地看到海上多了一条通往对面小岛的碎石路，两个三口之家正在碎石路上淌水捉螃蟹，此外还有玩皮艇的人们在陆续上皮艇准备下海。我意识到这是满潮前的现象，就坐在海边的大石头上看海潮。

我旁边三尺之内的大石头上坐着一位抱着一条长耳朵小狗狗的女士，她有一头浓密的棕色短卷发。我想起一句话：“后中年的女人，浓密头发是日子过得不错的象征之一。”

两个闲坐着的女人，以宠物和孩子东一句西一句地就聊起来了。

Anna，抱狗的女士，来自宾州（Pennsylvania）。她在看女儿和先生玩立式划桨（paddle boarding）。

我看着海水淹着的碎石路说：“在涨潮。”

Anna说：“是的，听说今天的满潮（high tide）在中午。”

我说：“我们刚来的周三，早上的满潮在9:46AM，看来满潮的时间每天都不一样。”

我看涨潮，Anna看女儿和先生玩划桨，我们一起闲聊宠物和儿女。

我问：“你的狗狗好可爱！叫什么？是男狗还是女狗？多大了？”

Anna说：“Keeper，四岁女狗。Keeper的意思就是我们会养她一生！”

我说：“我女儿上中学时领养了一种男猫，叫Frosty。Frosty因病去世后，她又领养了一种女猫，叫Kara。”

Anna好奇的问：“你女儿的猫猫是什么病去世的？”

我说：“估计是从加州飞麻州，又从麻州飞加州，不适应这些变化生病过世。Frosty吃了兽医给的镇静药，在从加州到麻州的飞机上很安静。可相同分量的同一种镇静药却不管用了，Frosty在从麻州到加州的六个多小时的飞机上一直在叫唤。”

Anna说：“我父母过去也经常带宠物坐飞机。我妈说：‘每次上飞机前给宠物喂半颗苯海拉明(Benadryl)就行了。’”

Anna又说：“四年前我们养Keeper时，朋友开玩笑说：‘你是用Keeper顶替上大学的儿子。’”

我问道：“你儿子大学毕业了？”

“是的，刚大学毕业，六月一日就入职工作了，所以这次休假儿子就没来。他22岁，学的是机械工程。”

我又问：“你女儿多大？”

“女儿18岁，明年上高四，八月份我们会和她一起去波士顿和纽约看大学。”

“你女儿喜欢什么专业？”

Anna很骄傲地说：“我女儿喜欢跳舞，参加过各种跳舞竞赛，爱好广泛；她也喜欢环境工程，海洋就是她最喜欢的地方之一。”

我恭维道：“听起来好多大学都会挑选你的女儿！”

Anna说：“是的，但是我们希望她挑选到她喜欢的专业，就像她哥哥挑选了机械工程。”

Anna还告诉我，两周前她和女儿开车去佛罗里达看望了母亲，所以这次从宾州到巴尔港的六百多英里路程就是她先生开的。他们已经预定了今晚6:30去卡迪拉克山(Cadillac mountain)。

Anna在中学教书二十多年了，她说：“因为疫情在家里呆了近两年，初中生已经忘记了学校的规矩，把学校里的走廊当大街随意奔跑。我在走廊上很担心被他们撞得仰翻，真想快点退休。”

Anna的父亲几年前去世了，她70多岁的母亲独自住在佛罗里达州（Florida）不愿意东迁。Anna有个弟弟，他每年也会去看望母亲几次。

海水完全淹没了那条碎石路后，已经十点过了，我临走前告诉Anna：“我等不到看满潮，因为我们要在11点前退房。祝你周末愉快！”

慢节奏漫游的精彩中常有细腻深沉的人文人情火花，因为多是闲情人。

小插曲

2022-08-13清晨，两个三口之家正在碎石路上淌水捉螃蟹：

2022-08-13清晨，潮水淹没碎石路的过程：

2020年初的疫情已经持续一年多了，现在还是一个常见的话题。

最近和一位学者聊到过去一年多的疫情带来的社会影响时，我凭直觉说：“我觉得疫情还是比战争更好，因为疫情期没有因为战火带来的伤亡，人们还能平常生活。”

学者说：“战争时期，非战区的娱乐场所还开放，人们还有正常的交流；不像现在餐馆、音乐厅、图书馆、博物馆、电影院、和健身房等公共场所都关闭的情形，人们相互隔离。这种隔离为已经习惯于丰富社交生活的现代人带来各种焦虑。”

学者的咬文嚼字让我想起2020年夏天居家令保持社交距离6尺实施不久的几个小故事：

被房产经纪人训斥

我已经习惯了把车停在搬走好久的邻居车位，因为年初邻居房子就空着没人住了。有一天，当我出门上车准备开车时，我听到有人在敲我的车窗，我扭头看到一位穿着整洁的职场女士冲着我打手势让我摇下车窗。我刚一摇下车窗，女士就不友好地质问我：“你知道这个停车位是谁的？”她的问题让我一愣，我纳闷这个陌生人是哪来的，怎么会问我这问题。我还没问答她，她紧接着重复问我：“你知道这个停车位是谁的吗？你知道这个停车位是谁的吗？”我看着她有点茫然地说：“这是邻居的车位。”她一古脑儿地告诉我：“我是你邻居请的卖房经理，房子虽然还没卖出去，房子虽然还没住人，可是这车位不是你的你就不该停这里！”我被她的话堵的很不舒服，但还是告诉她：“对不起，我不会再停这个车位了。”

在停车场和商店被责问

有一天早上，女儿和我买完菜推着购物小车向我们的车走去路过紧邻车位的车时，那车主正在往后备箱放东西。我们路过她后停在我们自己车的后备厢前，那车主突然转身很生气地冲着我们大声地问：“难道你们不懂要保持六尺距离吗？”虽然疫情要求人与人之间保持六尺距离，可商店停车场的停车距即没有六尺也没有限制隔一个车位停车，我们真是无法与紧邻车位站在后备厢前的人保持六尺距离。一大早就被人冲叫嚷，很不爽，至今还记得。

还有朋友讲的一个故事：“我在商店刚排上交钱的队，一位顾客突然走来指责我插队，她说她的购物车在排着队。我解释说：‘那购物车旁没人，我以为那不是在排队。对不起，您到我前面来吧。’可那顾客得理不饶人，排在我前面后还喋喋不休，我最后忍不住换到一个远离她的地方再排队付钱。”朋友又说：“我已经道歉了，她难道不懂什么是道歉吗？”

邻居敲门送花

始发于2020年的夏天的故事，朋友当时就吐槽：“一个大早邻居就来敲门，我打开门后，他非常生气地指责我昨晚推出去的垃圾桶挡道，他的车无法开出去。我刚想解释一下，可那邻居发完火后就转身而去，根本不给我说话的机会。” 不过这个故事一年后有个完美结局了，因为朋友说：“最近那位邻居又来敲门，还送上一束花为去年夏天快一年前的无礼举止道歉。”

2020年夏天我就感觉到最近遇到听到的不友好人次比较多。现在再回忆起来，我觉得这也许就是学者所谓的各种焦虑的表现吧，从表象中提取精华是学者的强项。

后补：

2021年鬼节，一位美丽的心理咨询师说：疫情期间常人对心理咨询的需求增加了。
2021年11月11日，在MGH医院候诊室里几个显示屏上不断滚动的“心理健康小技巧”似乎暗示着疫情后的心理疾病可能比较普遍了。

In the morning, as a taxi driver and a companion, I visited the hospital in downtown Boston.

As the depression and anxiety after the pandemic for more than a year became more common, I saw the small skills to maintain mental health are shown from time-to-time on all the rolling screens in the waiting room, such as “taking a new road to work to stimulate attention and activate brain cells.”, “remember to share your small achievements with friends and family.” , “have a small goal that can be achieved every day.”, and “keep a small book of positive thoughts or quotes to reflect on before your day begins.” I liked these tips very much.

Later, I searched online and found more expert’s talk on “tips for maintaining mental health”: stick to some achievable small goals every day, such as:
1. Staying outdoor 30 minutes a day.
2. Be a better listener by putting your feet into others’ shoes.
3. Willing to be known.
4. Be a better chatter.
5. Be friendly.
6. Be connected to people in different networking.
7. Volunteer regularly.
8. Save time to relax.
9. Wake up early.
10. Learn one new thing.
11. Learn a phrase of a foreign language.
12. Avoid becoming anxious by social media.
14. Write down key events in daily life.

Little Episodes

11-11-2021, one of the rolling screens in the waiting room:

“Mental Wellness Tip: Keep a small book of positive thoughts or quotes to reflect on before your day begins.”

Today’s Experience in the Hospital (2021)